Sunday Night Heat
Live
from the American Airlines Center in Dallas, Texas. Your
Hosts are Jonathan Coachman and Al Snow. Your
Survivor Series Pre-game Show. Coach
and Al welcome us in as the crowd begins filing into the arena-former sports a
neck brace (AKA ‘The Weasel Collar’) due to taking a 3D from the Dudley Boyz
last Monday. Coach states the injury won’t interfere with his announcing
duties tonight-he’s especially looking forward to interviewing Stone Cold
Steve Austin after his team (possibly) loses to Eric Bischoff’s later on. We
start right in on hyping some of the Raw roster matches for tonight’s PPV: 1.
Team Bischoff (Living Legend Chris Jericho, Christian, Mark Henry, Scott
Steiner & Randy Orton) vs. Team Austin (Booker T, Rob Van Dam, D-Von Dudley,
Bubba Ray Dudley & Shawn Michaels). Stakes: Austin’s team wins, he can
freely discipline wayward employees in any way he sees fit. Eric’s team wins
Stone Cold resigns as Raw co-General Manager. 2.
HHH challenges Bill Goldberg for the World Championship. 3.
Shane McMahon vs. Kane in an ‘ambulance match’. Video
documents the Kane vs. Shane feud, which began 3 months ago when Kane hit Linda
McMahon with a Tombstone Piledriver. Al goes
over rules for an ‘ambulance match’. Just like a casket match pretty much,
winner will be declared after one of the competitors throws his opponent into
the back of an ambulance and slams the door. Josh
Matthews and Rue (Josh’s co-host on the syndicated recap show Afterburn) go
over a couple of tonight’s matches on the Smackdown side: 1.
The Undertaker vs. Vince McMahon in a ‘Buried Alive’ match. 2.
Team Lesnar (WWE Champion Brock Lesnar, Matt Morgan, Nathan Jones,
A-Train & The Big Show) vs. Team Angle (Olympic Hero Kurt Angle, Chris
Benoit, Bradshaw, Bob Holly & John Cena.) We’re
informed that Jamie Noble challenging Tajiri for the Cruiserweight Championship,
announced earlier for the PPV, will instead take place right here on Heat. Works
for me! Break. Coach
and Al return for the mandatory plugging of the sponsors. Cut to
Lillian Garcia interviewing Team Bischoff’s de facto leader, Chris Jericho.
Y2J proudly acknowledges being the prime instigator of the movement to remove
Stone Cold from his position of power and picks a huge win for his team. (Commentary:
Lillian, making reference to Austin’s possible departure, first mentioned WWE,
then corrected herself to say Raw. Potential spoiler?) Cut to
The Undertaker at a Dallas Mavericks game. Dead Man was there to give team owner
Mark Cuban a replica of the WWE Championship belt. Mark also seemed to agree to
have ‘Taker’s back at tonight’s PPV. Hmm. Josh and
Rue tell us to order the PPV already! Break. Sting of
the Night: From last Thursday, Chavo Guerrero loses a handicap match to the
Basham Brothers, then undergoes a beatdown from the team and their manager
Shaniqua. Cut to
Chavo and his Uncle Eddy. Latter rages on the Bashams while Chavo looks on with
disinterest. Eddy asks what’s the deal-Chavo coolly states the incident last
Thursday could have been avoided if Eddy hadn’t gullibly fallen for a
pre-match distraction ploy. Eddy tells him to suck it up and get ready to beat
the Bashams and re-gain the WWE Tag Team Championships. Reference to ‘La
Familia’ manages to stoke Chavo’s fire. Josh and
Rue get in a quick bit of hype for Los Guerreros vs. The Bashams and Team Lesnar
vs. Team Angle. Generic Survivor Series promo video follows. Hype for Tajiri vs.
Noble sends us to break. Back, we
see Lita entering the arena. Later on she’ll be getting a shot at Molly
Holly’s Women’s Championship. Coach
and Al get in some hype for Goldberg vs. HHH. Video rolls of Bill defeating
Hunter for the title at September’s Unforgiven PPV. Soon after HHH announced
he was putting up a $100,000 bounty, to be awarded to the person or persons who
could put Goldberg out of action. Recipient ended up being former (and now
reinstated) Evolution faction member Dave Batista, who made his return to Raw in
a big way, injuring Goldberg’s ankle with a steel chair a few weeks ago. Al picks
Goldberg as the underdog in tonight’s title match due to his leg injury. Coach
ignores him and tells us to ORDER THE PPV, DAMMIT! Break. Coach
and Al return to show us another video hyping tonight’s PPV before sending us
down to Michael Cole and Tazz-they stand beside a grave erected on the entry
ramp (a huge earth-mover stands ready beside). Long video piece hyping
tonight’s ‘Buried Alive’ match rolls (thankfully Vince’s deranged promos
from last Thursday are omitted). Cruiserweight
title match is next. Final break. Digital
Play of the Night: From last month, Tajiri hits Jamie Noble’s girlfriend Nidia
with a faceful of black mist. (She hasn’t been seen on WWE TV since.) We
return to Cole and Tazz at the helm-former mentions Nidia still hasn’t
recovered her eyesight following surgery. We see the ambulance either Shane or
Kane will be taking a ride in later as we get down to business… Heat
Match: For the Cruiserweight Title: Jamie Noble vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri (champion).
Referee is Jimmy Korderas. Decent
pop for Jamie, big heat for Tajiri (flying solo, no sign of his lackeys Akio or
Sakada-for now). Jamie goes on the attack as Tajiri makes his way down the ramp,
forearms to the back are thrown, both men roll into the ring as the ref calls
for the bell. Tajiri gets to his feet first, Jamie gets kicked to a corner,
Tajiri hauls him up, Jamie gets sent face first into a top turnbuckle. Tajiri
screams like a banshee as he lays in boots to the gut, Jamie manages a reversal
of positions, Tajiri gets a dose of the boots then gets dropped via short-arm
clothesline. Jamie hauls Tajiri up at the ropes, whips him to opposite, Tajiri
goes for the handspring elbow as he rebounds, Jamie ducks under, Tajiri does
likewise for a wildly thrown clothesline, then connects with a mule kick to the
ribs. Jamie drops to his knees, Tajiri takes him down, goes for the quick cover,
just gets 2. Tajiri gets to his feet, connects with a quick boot to the head,
Jamie gets hauled to his feet, takes a trio of knees to the gut, Tajiri sets for
a suplex, then instead drops Jamie gut-first onto the top rope. Jamie falls to a
seated position, Tajiri again covers for 2. Jamie is again hauled up, Tajiri
gets in a pair of kneelifts before slapping on abdominal stretch. Jamie powers
up, breaks free, Tajiri goes down to a hiptoss, Jamie lays in a quick series of
boots before Tajiri flattens him with a kick to the face. Tajiri gets to his
feet, Jamie crawls up at the ropes, Tajiri sets for a big clothesline, Jamie
gets a boot up to the face, Tajiri staggers for a moment, tries for another
clothesline, Jamie ducks under, scores with a HUGE swinging neckbreaker, no
cover, both men stay down for a count of 4. Up, Jamie lays in forearms and
kicks, Tajiri drops to his knees, Jamie goes off ropes, Tajiri goes down to a
running knee to the temple. Jamie again goes off ropes, Tajiri groggily gets to
his feet, immediately returns to the canvas via back elbow to the face, Jamie
covers for 2. Tajiri is hauled up and whipped into a corner, Jamie charges,
Tajiri gets an elbow up to the face, Jamie backs to the center of the ring,
Tajiri charges RIGHT into a massive powerslam, Jamie covers for 2. Tajiri is
hauled to his knees, Jamie sets for the Tiger Driver-hello, we’ve got guests,
Tajiri’s pal Akio charges in, Jamie breaks off from Tajiri to quickly toss him
over the top to the outside. Sakada appears on the apron, Jamie sends him to the
outside mats with a forearm to the face. Behind his back Tajiri sets for the
mist-Jamie turns, gets his hands up, green mist to the face is blocked, Jamie
ducks under a roundhouse kick, scores with a boot to the gut, sets for the Tiger
Driver, scores BIGTIME, 1, 2, NO! (WTF?) Tajiri rolls to a corner, gets to his
feet, Jamie charges in, Tajiri barely springboards over, Jamie goes into
‘buckles. Tajiri sets for the Tarantula, Jamie blocks it, throws a series of
forearms to the back, ascends 2nd turnbuckle, looks for the Tornado
DDT, Tajiri retains his footing, sets Jamie on top turnbuckle, Tajiri takes a
pair of punches to the top of the head, Jamie follows up with the Trailer Park
Tarantula! Yeah! Ref calls for the break, Tajiri flops to the canvas, Jamie goes
up top, Akio and Sakada try to knock him off, they have no luck but buy time for
Tajiri to get to his feet, Jamie goes for the flying double-axehandle but takes
a kick to the ribs in mid-air. Jamie drops to his knees, Tajiri sets for the
kick of Obvious Total Death, connects (well, sort of…), Jamie down for the
count of 3. Real good match, way too short. Winner
and Still Cruiserweight Champion: Tajiri. Smackdown
crew send us over to Jim Ross and Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler, who show us video
hyping Team Bischoff vs. Team Austin. Show’s over, Survivor Series is next.
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